CELESTIAL SAINTS AND ANGELS BEGIN FOLLOWING NFL FOOTBALL

Arch Angel Gabriel, the "Saint" invoked when praying for "Good News," held an Omniscience ( Known on Earth as a "Press Conference" ) in Heaven today, confirming an ongoing rumor that several Saints and Angels have formed an Ad Hoc Club, "The Celestials," a group in Heaven that follows and celebrates the National Football League's New Orleans Saints and their Perfect 2009-2010 Season.

Asked whether the Father, Son, or Holy Spirit were involved, Gabriel replied, "The Holy Spirit and Our Lady were both deciding forces in establishing the new club and are very active members."

Other members of The Celestials are, in no particular order:

* Our Lady of Perpetual Succor, who is providing "Constant Help" to the New Orleans Saints, according to the Omniscience. She said "Our Lady of Prompt Succor is another dedicated member, which was not too surprising since she is the Patroness of New Orleans.

* Saint Dismas, also affectionately known as the "Good Thief," who has been aiding "Special Teams" as they recover fumbles and make interceptions. Saint Dismas said "It's wonderful to be stealing out in the open again, without having to worry about that dang cross! The appreciation for the Saintly football thievery has been unheralded." "I can't wait to rip off Tom Brady's helmet a few times."

* Saint Jude Thaddaeus, who signed up to assist New Orleans Saints Football Coach Sean Payton with "Difficult Situations" and "Impossible Plays." Jude said he has had light duty thus far, but expects things to get busy when "Some Patriots visit the Saints in the Superdome."

* Saint Joan of Arc, who is leading a crusade in Heaven much like her battles in her home town "back-in-the-day," the country now known as "France." Joan said, "It's thrilling to get people all riled up again. I'm not saying Heaven's not fun, because it definitely is, but it's kinda cool to be out and about with the people again, too."

* Saint Christopher, the saint "banished by the Vatican in 1969," who is guiding the New Orleans Saints as they travel near and far, and from goal post to goal post. When asked about whether he is even truly a Saint, Chris replied, "I'm a Saint alright and I do go down to Purgatory to visit with the bonehead Pope who tried to kick me out of Heaven." He quickly added, "But, I'm not bitter!"

Numerous other Saints and Angels are members of The Celestials, but did not reply in time to be included in this Omniscience.

To honor and wear your favorite member of The Celestials, visit http://www.saintsforsinners.com/ and collect them all, and remember that "the saints are the sinners who keep on trying."

( The Infant of Prague and Saint Expedite contributed to this Omniscience )

WHO DAT!

Tips for Managing the In-Laws, by Saint Elizabeth of Hungary

Having Trouble Managing or dreading dealing with the "In-Laws" during the upcoming Holidays? Saint Elizabeth of Hungary feels your pain and can help you grin and bear it!

Way before Zsa Zsa Gabor was disqualified in the Miss Hungary Beauty Contest in 1936, the people of Hungary had Elizabeth of Hungary as their role model.

Elizabeth was born in the 13th Century, and, according to the http://www.saintsforsinners.com/ story about her, (featured in its entirety, at left) her parents went about arranging her future marriage when she was a mere 4 years old!

Although that plan did not work out, Elizabeth still married early, became Queen, had 3 kids and lived a happy life. That is, until her husband died while he was on a crusade. It was then that things got difficult with the in-laws.

Elizabeth's brother-in-law, Henry, kicked Elizabeth out of her castle, along with her 3 kids, one of whom was the rightful heir to the throne!

She persevered, however, and soon becme part of a Franciscan Order where she worked hard to help the poor, teaching them how to fend for themselves in difficult times. She did, after all, have first-hand knowledge of that, "thanks" to her mean old brother-in-law, Henry.

Sadly, she wound up with another loser, Conrad of Marzburg, who was violent and cruel, and beat her mercilessly..

But Elizabeth of Hungary still managed to practice what is sometimes called "mindfulness" these days, (loosely defined here as a principle, Buddhist in origin, that is sort of like repeating a mantra that says "mind over matter") and again persevered through her hardships.

Elizabeth died at the young age of 24. She went on the fast track and became a saint only four years later.

Today, November 17th, is Saint Elizabeth of Hungary's "Feast Day," a day to celebrate her life, her virtue, and her example.

Saint Elizabeth of Hungary asks all of us, who may be grousing about the Holidays and the in-laws, to just "suck it up and deal," adding, "If your in-laws may be annoying to you, you're probably annoying to them too. Call it a wash!" Saint Elizabeth reminds us to "rise above other peoples' differences that seem irksome, and celebrate differences instead!"